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High Commissioner's harsh word for spongers THE Nigerian
High Commissioner in the United Kingdom, Prince Bola Ajibola,
last night in London urged Nigerians to do as they would be done
by and to remember that one good turn deserves another. Ajibola said, "For instance, I am feeding all of you now. You are all smacking your lips as choice drinks of wine, Gulder beer and 'Odeku' are filling your tables. And I have only one simple question for you: what are you going to give me in return?" He told invited guests and other freeloaders: "Nothing goes for nothing. As you take what I offer, you should be able to give me want I want. Exchange is no robbery-o!" That way, we can co-exist in peace and our country will be great again. The former judge of the International Court of Justice (ICJ), The Hague, Netherlands, said since he took over the commission, it has become very charitable, stressing that the mean attitude of its staff towards Nigerians is now a thing of the past. He gave an assurance that requests for handouts, soup bowls as well as financial support would no longer be delayed, as long as the recipients have good intentions of repaying. However, he added, most of the other requests like those for visas, passports, business contacts, would be attended to and dispensed with promptly, within 48 months. The High Commissioner urged Nigerian media practitioners to be in the forefront of projecting the Nigerian media concept of fair exchange positively, rather than follow the Western concept of doing public good for nothing, unconditionally, gratis. He noted that The Western media's attitude of providing information to their public gratis, not only projected their people positively, but also defended their interests, something that the Nigerian media should not emulate. -------------------------------------------------- Nigeria on track for the real McCoy, says Obasanjo At a Fashion
parade organised at the state House, Abuja, to mark the end of
Ramadan, President Olusegun Obasanjo said that there are sufficient
indications that Nigerian religious and political bigwigs are
fully back on the track of self-development that will improve
their lives. The president said ordinary Nigerians had cause to thank God for giving them visionary, well-dressed leaders who are able to exhibit the spirit of self-promotion, which is a prerequisite for national progress and development. Fashion-conscious Obasanjo, appropriately dressed for the occasion in a heavily- embroidered ceremonial robe, al-Kyabba and a matching petite white cap, Tajia, played host to Vice-President Atiku Abubakar who had in his company some of the country's most eminent fashion personalities. On the catwalk, big show-offs like the Power and Steel Minister Danjuma Goje, Chief of Staff to the president Maj-Gen Abdullahi Mohammed (rtd), Minister of Environment Hassan Adamu, Inter-Governmental Relations Minister Umar Kida, displayed their dazzling apparel to a roar of applause from State House officials and correspondents in the gallery. Others who strutted the catwalk in their state-of-the-art Babarigas were Minister of Special Duties Yomi Edu, Chief Justice Lawal Uwais, Federal Capital Territory Minister Ibrahim Bunu, Special Adviser to the President on Petroleum, Rilwan Lukman and Police Inspector-General Musiliu Smith. At the end of the show there was a line-up at which the president, accompanied by the vice-president, was opportune to shake hands with the cast and to inspect individual robes at close quarters with a view to placing his order. Afterwards, thanking the vice-president for the display, President Obasanjo wearing a wry grin, remarked that although all the apparel were rich and of the highest standard, none was richer and more original than his. Said he to the VP: "I told you my own outfit is the real McCoy. It is from the source." -------------------------------------------------- New
strategies for In a country
where the GDP is less that N15 per head, about N8.8 billion, the
equivalent of N100 per head, is required to conduct the year 2001
population and housing census, the chairman of the National Population
Commission, Lt. Col. Chris Ugokwe (rtd), has said. The chairman said this in Abuja when members of the Senate Committee on National Planning led by its chairman, Senator Lekan Balogun, paid him a visit. Lt. Col. Ugokwe (rtd) told the senators that "the sum of N2.31 per head proposed to be allocated as capital budget will no longer be enough." The chairman said thanks to the United Nations (UN) which first opened the NPC's eyes to the possibility of getting more money. He said that as soon as they got wind of the N100 per head possibility, his commission bought the idea, lock, stock and barrel. Prior to this suggestion, Ugokwe said the commission had taken good housekeeping measures to cut their coat according to their cloth, to stay within the N231 million budget. But with the idea that N8.8 billion (N100 per Nigerian) could come their way, there is now an urgent need to devise new strategies to take care of the difference. He added that to salt away the booty, the NPC has commenced underground work through Swiss Banking Agency (SBA), remarking that a total of 5,012 aliases will be created and, hopefully, the new accounts will be up and running in six months. With this kind of money safely in the bank, the chairman said, he will be powerful enough to lobby the government to review the 1999 Constitution, which provides for up to 73 bigwig ten percent-ers to be accommodated by NPC. This constitutional provision as it stands, he said, would only invite a kind of gold rush, noting that every idiot will want to reap where they did not sow. There would simply be an unnecessary stampede towards a goldmine whose vast deposit is sitting safely in Swiss vaults. In his response, Senator Balogun said it is obvious that NPC will be under a lot of pressure and open to blackmail, saying: " But if you conducted an excellent Census within the N231 million budget, nobody, not even the United Nations Population Fund (UNPF), will kick up a dust." Said one member of the Senate Committee on National Planning, "This is Nigeria. We can't help it that corruption is the order of the day. What we are asking for is corruption with a human face, as it is practised in other parts of the world - take whatever, but provide the service." ---------------------------------------------------- Warning: Our
disclaimer applies strongly here. It would be foolish of you to
believe a word of the stories. The raw materials for our parodies
can be found at the Organic
section, Newswarts
and all -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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