Personal

Nigerian girl, 25, currently living in London, going back home soon seeks a wealthy sugar-daddy based in Nigeria to take good care of me. Photos not necessary.

African Prince, my age, nationality, royal line don't matter. I want black women for good time. Come as you are. Any size, any shape. Large bottom preferred.

40-ish, fair-skinned, accomplished African woman let down by men my own age, now seeks young, virile African man, as toy boy or who knows?

Handsome Ghanaian lawyer, 36, royal parentage seeks Ghanaian Ashanti woman 25-30 for serious relationship. Must be well-educated.

Zambian merry gentleman, 35, wants a non-drinking, well-spoken and understanding East/Southern African lady, 30-40 with own car to wean me away from hard drinking.

Rich African Chief, businessman 48, with wives, visits England regularly, seeks young African ladies 20-30 with own London accommodation for uncomplicated relationship

NOTICE

Will the Nigerian chap that borrowed my blue bic biro (ballpen) at the Victoria Pub, Queensbridge Road, Hackney, last week, but forgot to give it back, please bring it along to the same pub on or before October 1. I desperately need it.
P.S: My blue bic biro is more important to me than some petty selfish political wrangling over Bakassi Peninsula that's been going on between our two countries for years. If that's what's keeping you away, please leave my property with Thandi, the pub's landlord. Pauline Biya

Messages

Missing brown envelope containing business and personal documents, a Nigerian passport and driving licence, etc. Lost in the West End, London, due to own carelessness.
If found please send to the nearest police station and NOT to the Nigeria High Commission please! They are not here to serve the likes of me - Frank Oligbo

The Nigerian Policemen who brazenly seized my Nigerian passport, £50 cash plus duty free goodies including 200 Benson & Hedges cigarettes, a bottle of Remy Martin brandy and Givenchy eau de toilette for men. The incident occurred at the police checkpoint along Murtala Muhammed Airport Road, Lagos, Nigeria, on my arrival to the country from abroad last week.

In case you are looking for your A-K 47 rifles, 2 torch lights, 2 name-badges, 1 transistor radio, 2 plastic cups, a brown envelope containing N2,000 in used N5 and N10 notes, 2 cartons of Gulder beer, 1 carton of "Odeku" Guinness beer, 2 bottles of local gin "Ogogoro", 1 keg of palm wine, several vehicle particulars and a black account book. Look, no further, I have them!

I dispossessed you of them while you were busy rifling through my luggage, acting god. If you want your things back, you have to return mine, plus N10,000* to the address I pasted under the bench in your checkpoint shed. You have 14 days to do so, failing which you will hear from my professional blackmailers. - Sina Agbewiri
*I paid the N10,000 to buy back my Nigerian passport from Oluwole St., the counterfeit/stolen goods market.

The Doubting Thomas I met at the train station last Sunday. You must by now have found my phone number neatly written on the Y-Front you had on that day. Wondering how it got there? Praise the Lord! Contact me now. God loves you. - Evangelist Grace

Telephone manners. I will no longer tolerate anyone, be they friends or family, who on telephoning me use the following opening line: "Haba, Tunde, where do you always go? You were not there when I telephoned yesterday. Stay in one place, man!"
It is my business where I go and what I do. Please stop it, or I'll kill somebody - Tunde Anikulowo